This is the perfect piece for me right now because I was asking myself that very question last night, after an agent's disappointing rejection of a full. Like you, I feel like I've tried many other creative outlets and this is the one that stuck. So for now, I'll endure the pain of rejection, and carry on with it.
If it's any consolation, you're in good company. Rejection is, sadly and too often, what comes after the long, hard creation of our work. Recognition is in short supply. So is payment. So we're stuck with satisfaction. Along with doubt.
Still, if we carry on, satisfaction wins. We're doing this because we want to. So far, asking what else we writers might do if we weren't doing this has been a big bust.
I've published or had accepted 50+ stories and essays during the last two years when I put aside a novel. I haven't counted the rejections even though Submittable would tell me if I wanted to.
It took me two years at the beginning of my career to sell my first collection of short stories, un-agented, and before that, five years to sell my second story after making a big splash with my first. I'm a Taurus and we are stubborn. :-)
I've only recently begun writing formally on Substack but still hold an office gig to pay bills. If the writing becomes something that I can live on, I'd be ecstatic.
I always wrote, to some degree, mostly expansive email responses to friends. Ideas and thoughts always tumbled out of me and some people suggested I start a podcast to share them, likely because they were tired of hearing me vent in conversation or seeing them over email. I'm not confident enough about my own speaking voice or ability to hold people's attention speaking off the cuff, so the podcast idea is on a back burner. I'm only barely more confident to write it down and so I do.
Writing has become my outlet for the many things I think and feel. Without it, I have no other way to share because it's impossible to speak it all to anyone in person. Even if no one reads it, getting it out in a composition is cathartic and sustains me.
I see me too in what you've written here. I'm not good at small talk or speaking in a group without a script. I need to be able to rewrite everything that comes out! I tried doing a podcast and I hated my voice. I may try it again, but for now it's words on 'paper'. It's where I'm most comfortable.
I'd do more photography. But the problem is I'd still want to write about and share my thoughts about the places we've been. I wonder if I could completely quit. It's an interesting question.
True story: Feeling despair after repeated rejections of my first book, I told my spouse I was through with writing. And then an editor in New York called one evening and offered me a contract. When I shared the news, my spouse said, "Didn't you tell him you were giving up writing as a career?" :-)
My husband was that way, too. He was my best first reader, catching things I would have missed and sometimes making light fun of where I was veering off when I should have stayed on the right path. I miss that.
I would be a lawyer. I chose to start a newspaper over going to law school. I regret that every day. And not. I’ve spent my life avoiding being a writer,, but not being able to escape it.
That's interesting, Carrie. Have you written about it? Is law school out of the question now?
And while you've been trying to avoid being a writer, here you are. Which must mean there's something appealing about it and you're hooked. Like the rest of us!
I published a newspaper for 23 years. I have never not written. We even found some stories I wrote as a child when we cleaned out our house. I’ve been avoiding long form, which I’m tackling now, and which I kinda do with podcasts. But my work was always entwined with something else - running a business, hosting radio shows, doing theatre. It was never my identity. I’ve always had a love/hate relationship with it. A couple of years ago, I was like, “Fuck that! I need to write. I NEED to write. It’s who I am.”
As usual, I'm overthinking. Is the question predicated on making money with the pursuit? Does it assume I'm making money now, with writing (other than a handful of paid subscriptions, nope!).
When Understandably's Bill Murphy asked the question of how his readers would spend a year, if money were no object, I swayed down a similar path. That one was a little less fraught with indecision, because it theoretically eliminated both the financial and aptitude components. I came up with ideas like going back to school for a degree in social work (that's my Brene Brown brain talking), or psychology, or neuroscience. I'd enjoy going deep into less formally academic explorations, like eating and cooking with figs from all around the world.
On the more traditionally creative front, I'd probably try my hand(s) at learning guitar again. I love the idea of taking up pottery. I might more seriously consider publishing--a collection of essays or a children's book. I've always wondered if I would enjoy glass blowing.
The sad truth is that I've not figured out how to live without an income, so I addle every egg before it hatches assuming I would never be good enough, or get there soon enough, to afford to take the risk. Ugh!
I guess I was thinking more dream-like and not as in making a living, but it's probably clear by now that I've never been a huge fan of reality.
I've given up hope that writing will pay my bills so now I look to it for satisfaction, for joy. I'm not always getting that lately, and I do think of quitting. But I can't think of anything else that could take its place.
Interesting that you mentioned glass-blowing. I've always wanted to do that, but THAT is hard work! Physical work! So that's out for me.
I would like to learn to play the piano. I may still do that, but it'll probably have to come second to my writing. I think I'll have to be okay with that.
Got it! Dream away! Reality definitely blows sometimes, so I'm all about dipping in and out of fandom as needed.
It's doubtful I'd have the capacity for glass-blowing, or for many of the other pursuits I mentioned. But, I was letting my imagination run wild until the r-word ruined the fun.
I've thought, more than once, about your inclination to question your purpose and fulfillment as a writer. I didn't know you well enough before, and I don't want to go all armchair psychiatrist on you, but I can't help but think that since losing Ed, your art is being unconsciously required to hold more responsibility than it did before, to fill the void.
We ask a lot of ourselves, and our craft, don't we?
You're a pretty good armchair psychiatrist, my friend. The fact is, I'm terrified right now, and it affects every part of my life. I'm questioning everything, and since my writing is such a big part of my life, yes, I guess I do expect it to save me.
It has, in a way, because I've been able to write out my thoughts to some degree, but I feel as if I'm stagnating. When I pull out my old pieces I see how much better I was than I am now, under this cloud that won't let me fly free.
So I ask these questions hoping to find some clarity but also to bring us together, because I know we all have our own doubts. It's good to talk this out.
Thank you, Elizabeth. You pegged it. Now I'm going to think about what you said. It could change everything.
When Michigan State University purchased my current and literary papers and carted off 93 boxes from my attic, something inside of me changed. "I have a legacy now," I thought. I felt less driven. I didn't stop writing and publishing, but I felt freer about it.
As well you should! I didn't realize your works were at MSU. What an accomplishment. I would say 'rest now' but I'm betting that never happens. You've earned the right to ease up. Enjoy. I would say 'do it your way now' but I'm guessing you always have.
Best comment from a friend about selling my papers: "You've earned a small share of dusty immortality." Best family comment when I said I now had a history: "You've always had one, but now it's got an index."
I'm an artist first and the writing is a way for me to make money from my creative output while leaving the art as my passion project. I'm always making something.
I think for me writing is only starting to be something I am doing or actually am rediscovering my love for. I don’t feel very good at it yet, I have other things (painting/drawing) that are my go to creative outlets. But I am hoping that writing will stick:)
Oh, you are good at it. I just looked at Meadow Journal (love the name) and it's inspired and delightful. Great pictures and art work. Can't wait to see more.
Making music, writing songs, playing in a band, making comics, going for walks, playing video games, watching television, reading, hanging out with friends and family. The same stuff I do now when I am not writing.
Writing is just one of the many things I do. I would call myself a musician more than I would call myself a writer. Music was my first love and strongest creative passion. I came to writing later in life.
That is the tougher one. Writing is probably my second choice as a creative outlet. But I simply can’t imagine a life without music. Which I assume is the same for writers.
I will always find a creative outlet, though. They keep me sane.
Even if it’s just doodling. Or recreating the collective works of Shakespeare as a mural using Scrabble tiles.
I also have former creative pursuits that I could possibly return to (theatre, dance) but neither feels as satisfying now as writing does. Without writing, I’d be helping my hubs produce social media content for his art, researching our family history (I find the investigation very creative), maybe gardening (but quite a learning curve there for me...)
I'm not sure what I'd be doing but I'd definitely be making more money.
LOL. Okay, but what would you do that would satisfy your creativity as much as writing?
I'd be a cartoonist. Charles Schulz is one of my heroes. But I can't draw. Even my stick figures don't come out right.
If I couldn’t write. I’d cease to breath. So- I guess I’d have to be a fish?
Well then you'd better keep writing!
Any artistic pursuit carried out for gain is a sign there aren’t many other options!
This is the perfect piece for me right now because I was asking myself that very question last night, after an agent's disappointing rejection of a full. Like you, I feel like I've tried many other creative outlets and this is the one that stuck. So for now, I'll endure the pain of rejection, and carry on with it.
If it's any consolation, you're in good company. Rejection is, sadly and too often, what comes after the long, hard creation of our work. Recognition is in short supply. So is payment. So we're stuck with satisfaction. Along with doubt.
Still, if we carry on, satisfaction wins. We're doing this because we want to. So far, asking what else we writers might do if we weren't doing this has been a big bust.
The writers here are in it for the long haul.
It makes me really happy to hear this.
I've published or had accepted 50+ stories and essays during the last two years when I put aside a novel. I haven't counted the rejections even though Submittable would tell me if I wanted to.
It took me two years at the beginning of my career to sell my first collection of short stories, un-agented, and before that, five years to sell my second story after making a big splash with my first. I'm a Taurus and we are stubborn. :-)
I feel your disappointment. I could wallpaper my house with rejection letters and emails.
Me, too!
I've only recently begun writing formally on Substack but still hold an office gig to pay bills. If the writing becomes something that I can live on, I'd be ecstatic.
I always wrote, to some degree, mostly expansive email responses to friends. Ideas and thoughts always tumbled out of me and some people suggested I start a podcast to share them, likely because they were tired of hearing me vent in conversation or seeing them over email. I'm not confident enough about my own speaking voice or ability to hold people's attention speaking off the cuff, so the podcast idea is on a back burner. I'm only barely more confident to write it down and so I do.
Writing has become my outlet for the many things I think and feel. Without it, I have no other way to share because it's impossible to speak it all to anyone in person. Even if no one reads it, getting it out in a composition is cathartic and sustains me.
I see me too in what you've written here. I'm not good at small talk or speaking in a group without a script. I need to be able to rewrite everything that comes out! I tried doing a podcast and I hated my voice. I may try it again, but for now it's words on 'paper'. It's where I'm most comfortable.
And 'cathartic' is good.
One thing that acting and teaching helped me with is working with an audience. I love being on a book tour or teaching a workshop or master class.
I'd do more photography. But the problem is I'd still want to write about and share my thoughts about the places we've been. I wonder if I could completely quit. It's an interesting question.
That's why I asked it. Could any of us completely quit? I think about it from time to time, but could I really?
Nah. I couldn't.
True story: Feeling despair after repeated rejections of my first book, I told my spouse I was through with writing. And then an editor in New York called one evening and offered me a contract. When I shared the news, my spouse said, "Didn't you tell him you were giving up writing as a career?" :-)
LOL. "An editor in NY called one evening..."
Okay, that, but your spouse is quick!
I am thankfully married to someone very good at well-timed, respectful humor.
My husband was that way, too. He was my best first reader, catching things I would have missed and sometimes making light fun of where I was veering off when I should have stayed on the right path. I miss that.
I can relate.
We're both writers and each other's best editors.
I would be a lawyer. I chose to start a newspaper over going to law school. I regret that every day. And not. I’ve spent my life avoiding being a writer,, but not being able to escape it.
That's interesting, Carrie. Have you written about it? Is law school out of the question now?
And while you've been trying to avoid being a writer, here you are. Which must mean there's something appealing about it and you're hooked. Like the rest of us!
I published a newspaper for 23 years. I have never not written. We even found some stories I wrote as a child when we cleaned out our house. I’ve been avoiding long form, which I’m tackling now, and which I kinda do with podcasts. But my work was always entwined with something else - running a business, hosting radio shows, doing theatre. It was never my identity. I’ve always had a love/hate relationship with it. A couple of years ago, I was like, “Fuck that! I need to write. I NEED to write. It’s who I am.”
I like your attitude!
As usual, I'm overthinking. Is the question predicated on making money with the pursuit? Does it assume I'm making money now, with writing (other than a handful of paid subscriptions, nope!).
When Understandably's Bill Murphy asked the question of how his readers would spend a year, if money were no object, I swayed down a similar path. That one was a little less fraught with indecision, because it theoretically eliminated both the financial and aptitude components. I came up with ideas like going back to school for a degree in social work (that's my Brene Brown brain talking), or psychology, or neuroscience. I'd enjoy going deep into less formally academic explorations, like eating and cooking with figs from all around the world.
On the more traditionally creative front, I'd probably try my hand(s) at learning guitar again. I love the idea of taking up pottery. I might more seriously consider publishing--a collection of essays or a children's book. I've always wondered if I would enjoy glass blowing.
The sad truth is that I've not figured out how to live without an income, so I addle every egg before it hatches assuming I would never be good enough, or get there soon enough, to afford to take the risk. Ugh!
I guess I was thinking more dream-like and not as in making a living, but it's probably clear by now that I've never been a huge fan of reality.
I've given up hope that writing will pay my bills so now I look to it for satisfaction, for joy. I'm not always getting that lately, and I do think of quitting. But I can't think of anything else that could take its place.
Interesting that you mentioned glass-blowing. I've always wanted to do that, but THAT is hard work! Physical work! So that's out for me.
I would like to learn to play the piano. I may still do that, but it'll probably have to come second to my writing. I think I'll have to be okay with that.
Got it! Dream away! Reality definitely blows sometimes, so I'm all about dipping in and out of fandom as needed.
It's doubtful I'd have the capacity for glass-blowing, or for many of the other pursuits I mentioned. But, I was letting my imagination run wild until the r-word ruined the fun.
I've thought, more than once, about your inclination to question your purpose and fulfillment as a writer. I didn't know you well enough before, and I don't want to go all armchair psychiatrist on you, but I can't help but think that since losing Ed, your art is being unconsciously required to hold more responsibility than it did before, to fill the void.
We ask a lot of ourselves, and our craft, don't we?
You're a pretty good armchair psychiatrist, my friend. The fact is, I'm terrified right now, and it affects every part of my life. I'm questioning everything, and since my writing is such a big part of my life, yes, I guess I do expect it to save me.
It has, in a way, because I've been able to write out my thoughts to some degree, but I feel as if I'm stagnating. When I pull out my old pieces I see how much better I was than I am now, under this cloud that won't let me fly free.
So I ask these questions hoping to find some clarity but also to bring us together, because I know we all have our own doubts. It's good to talk this out.
Thank you, Elizabeth. You pegged it. Now I'm going to think about what you said. It could change everything.
C'mere a sec! {*{*{*hug*}*}*} Not sure if you needed that or not, Ramona, but I thought I'd offer it. 💚
Oh, I needed it! Sending hugs right back. ❤️
When Michigan State University purchased my current and literary papers and carted off 93 boxes from my attic, something inside of me changed. "I have a legacy now," I thought. I felt less driven. I didn't stop writing and publishing, but I felt freer about it.
As well you should! I didn't realize your works were at MSU. What an accomplishment. I would say 'rest now' but I'm betting that never happens. You've earned the right to ease up. Enjoy. I would say 'do it your way now' but I'm guessing you always have.
Best comment from a friend about selling my papers: "You've earned a small share of dusty immortality." Best family comment when I said I now had a history: "You've always had one, but now it's got an index."
I'm an artist first and the writing is a way for me to make money from my creative output while leaving the art as my passion project. I'm always making something.
The best of both worlds! I envy you.
A blessing and a curse at times. Sometimes I wish I could focus a bit better, but it's not the worst problem to have.
Probably much more focused on business ownership and investing.
I like the time I spend writing, though! I'd love to keep doing it.
I think for me writing is only starting to be something I am doing or actually am rediscovering my love for. I don’t feel very good at it yet, I have other things (painting/drawing) that are my go to creative outlets. But I am hoping that writing will stick:)
Oh, you are good at it. I just looked at Meadow Journal (love the name) and it's inspired and delightful. Great pictures and art work. Can't wait to see more.
https://meadowjournal.substack.com/p/dear-june?nthPub=5081
Oh thank you so much, your words mean a lot.
Painting.
Making music, writing songs, playing in a band, making comics, going for walks, playing video games, watching television, reading, hanging out with friends and family. The same stuff I do now when I am not writing.
Writing is just one of the many things I do. I would call myself a musician more than I would call myself a writer. Music was my first love and strongest creative passion. I came to writing later in life.
Hmm. I guess I'd have to ask this question of you then. If you didn't have your music what would you be doing?
That is the tougher one. Writing is probably my second choice as a creative outlet. But I simply can’t imagine a life without music. Which I assume is the same for writers.
I will always find a creative outlet, though. They keep me sane.
Even if it’s just doodling. Or recreating the collective works of Shakespeare as a mural using Scrabble tiles.
What a creative use of Scrabble tiles! You'd need a mile-long wall for that one!
I also have former creative pursuits that I could possibly return to (theatre, dance) but neither feels as satisfying now as writing does. Without writing, I’d be helping my hubs produce social media content for his art, researching our family history (I find the investigation very creative), maybe gardening (but quite a learning curve there for me...)
It makes me think of the classic advice to actors and writers. If you can not be a writer, don’t be a writer. That leaves only those who must.
Great advice. I'm thinking of shouting it from the mountaintops.
I loved reading this. I too tried pottery - bought a wheel on TradeMe (NZ's ebay) for $40. Sold it for $20 two months later 😂.
I love writing - if I didn't write I'd probably drink more! It's a huge win-win.
Thanks..........
Well, in that case, you're right where you should be!
Wow I set out to answer this and I can’t answer this! I’ve considered myself a writer since I was six years old!
No, I couldn't either. That's why I asked it. And it looks like we're not alone!
Me too! I was in love with stories and a very early reader.