Thanks for letting me know. I did report him to Substack, in a way. I was having trouble blocking him on one of my newsletters and sent them his comments to show them why I wanted him blocked. Maybe they'll finally do something.
I'll never understand trolls. They get their jollies by irritating as many people as possible, using fake names online so they can hide like the cowards they are.
His newsletter is strange, too. All sweetness and light until it isn't. As if there are two different personalities there.
Ban without compunction, Ramona. It would be one thing if he was engaging in civil discourse with you -- which he appeared to be doing in his first comments, here -- but another entirely when it just becomes vicious.
I had to ban someone a few months ago and it was so hard for me. I left their comments up (one is on my About page, right there for anyone to read, including my response, as well as the response of another reader who came to my defense, which was a huge surprise) but I banned them from subscribing and commenting. My feeling is that my newsletter needs to be a safe place for me. That doesn't mean I'm never uncomfortable, that doesn't mean I don't have hard conversations, but that does mean that I don't have to willingly take abuse from any random person on the internet, about anything. I might let someone stand in my yard and yell about how much I suck and how much better they are than me, but I'd close the window, you know?
Not too much to ask at all. You absolutely did the right thing. His opinion was appalling. Can't imagine the women in his life listen much to him and for good reason. Scary how these types have been stoked by we all know who.
I deleted a comment he made here after I wrote this. Just 'congratulations', but it unnerved me, since I thought I had him blocked. I went back and tried blocking him again. I hope it worked this time.
Well said, Sarah. It’s completely fine to have a nuanced political discussion when you disagree with a person’s viewpoint, but that clearly wasn’t the case here.
Yes to everything Sarah said. Having a difference of opinion, of course. Spewing bigoted venom, no, never. You did exactly what you should have. That guy earned that ban as much as anyone's earned anything.
Don’t feel you have an obligation to care for and feed the trolls. Hatred and ignorance are corrosive and pervasive enough without weaponizing them. We try to reach people and inspire them through our words; when that fails, sometimes we have to close the gate.
Thanks. I had visions of other readers going after him in a free-for-all, too. Another reason I felt a complete ban was in order. I don't want that in either of my newsletters.
You go girl!! People like that who are clearly doing this to stir up trouble, don't deserve to be here. They all live in the FOX bubble and can't see beyond the end of their nose. :)
I agree with your decision to ban him. It appears that what began as a civil interaction devolved into a case of bullying and trolling. When it gets to that level it's time to disengage. In the context of writing a newsletter I think a ban is certainly an effective way of doing that.
Take care, and I hope this the last time you need to ban someone.
I think his words had an undertone of complete disrespect and aggression. He could have spoken in a far less confrontational and mannered way. Besides, 'your party, your rules.' As moderators of our own accounts, we get to decide who stays and who goes. I don't blame you or cast aspersions at you - you did what is right for you. As he obviously did for himself.
That said, I'd love a lesson in how one bans someone...
Prue, there are three dots at the bottom of each comment. If you click on them you'll see a place where you can block or ban that person. You have a choice to block them from commenting or banning altogether. I ran into problems when it asked for his email address. It took me a while to find it and now I don't remember how I did it! Sorry.
Thank you, Ramona, I appreciate your reply. It's a start and whilst my newsletter is a very quiet, old place, you just never know when you might need the block button.
Ugh. That had to be a hard decision. It's the thing that I'm struggling with on Twitter. I want to have a positive experience there but I'm afraid that too many people just prefer to be negative. If it helps, I think you did the right thing.
Thanks for letting me know. I did report him to Substack, in a way. I was having trouble blocking him on one of my newsletters and sent them his comments to show them why I wanted him blocked. Maybe they'll finally do something.
I'll never understand trolls. They get their jollies by irritating as many people as possible, using fake names online so they can hide like the cowards they are.
His newsletter is strange, too. All sweetness and light until it isn't. As if there are two different personalities there.
But moving on...
Ban without compunction, Ramona. It would be one thing if he was engaging in civil discourse with you -- which he appeared to be doing in his first comments, here -- but another entirely when it just becomes vicious.
I had to ban someone a few months ago and it was so hard for me. I left their comments up (one is on my About page, right there for anyone to read, including my response, as well as the response of another reader who came to my defense, which was a huge surprise) but I banned them from subscribing and commenting. My feeling is that my newsletter needs to be a safe place for me. That doesn't mean I'm never uncomfortable, that doesn't mean I don't have hard conversations, but that does mean that I don't have to willingly take abuse from any random person on the internet, about anything. I might let someone stand in my yard and yell about how much I suck and how much better they are than me, but I'd close the window, you know?
If it was a one-off it might be different, but he left five ugly comments within a few minutes, which told me he would never let up if he got noticed.
Yes, I always want my newsletters to be safe places, and while opinions may differ, I expect them to be civil. Not too much to ask.
It's not. You did the right thing.
Not too much to ask at all. You absolutely did the right thing. His opinion was appalling. Can't imagine the women in his life listen much to him and for good reason. Scary how these types have been stoked by we all know who.
I deleted a comment he made here after I wrote this. Just 'congratulations', but it unnerved me, since I thought I had him blocked. I went back and tried blocking him again. I hope it worked this time.
No, he's one of the good guys!
I deleted the comment because it's not fair to reveal someone's email if they desire privacy.
I agree with Sarah entirely here. He wasn't interested in conversation, just vilification. No one is required to make space for that.
Well said, Sarah. It’s completely fine to have a nuanced political discussion when you disagree with a person’s viewpoint, but that clearly wasn’t the case here.
Yes to everything Sarah said. Having a difference of opinion, of course. Spewing bigoted venom, no, never. You did exactly what you should have. That guy earned that ban as much as anyone's earned anything.
Don’t feel you have an obligation to care for and feed the trolls. Hatred and ignorance are corrosive and pervasive enough without weaponizing them. We try to reach people and inspire them through our words; when that fails, sometimes we have to close the gate.
Thanks. I had visions of other readers going after him in a free-for-all, too. Another reason I felt a complete ban was in order. I don't want that in either of my newsletters.
You go girl!! People like that who are clearly doing this to stir up trouble, don't deserve to be here. They all live in the FOX bubble and can't see beyond the end of their nose. :)
I just looked at his newsletter and he has a new anti-feminist piece up, so I guess he's out of the closet.
Put simply there are reasonable limits to as to how far you should accommodate a rude and duplicitous guest.
Don't feed the trolls. Ban, if needed, and move on. Have a crumpet and some tea; it's a beautiful day outside.
I agree with your decision to ban him. It appears that what began as a civil interaction devolved into a case of bullying and trolling. When it gets to that level it's time to disengage. In the context of writing a newsletter I think a ban is certainly an effective way of doing that.
Take care, and I hope this the last time you need to ban someone.
Me too! It's the pits!
I think his words had an undertone of complete disrespect and aggression. He could have spoken in a far less confrontational and mannered way. Besides, 'your party, your rules.' As moderators of our own accounts, we get to decide who stays and who goes. I don't blame you or cast aspersions at you - you did what is right for you. As he obviously did for himself.
That said, I'd love a lesson in how one bans someone...
Prue, there are three dots at the bottom of each comment. If you click on them you'll see a place where you can block or ban that person. You have a choice to block them from commenting or banning altogether. I ran into problems when it asked for his email address. It took me a while to find it and now I don't remember how I did it! Sorry.
Thank you, Ramona, I appreciate your reply. It's a start and whilst my newsletter is a very quiet, old place, you just never know when you might need the block button.
Ugh. That had to be a hard decision. It's the thing that I'm struggling with on Twitter. I want to have a positive experience there but I'm afraid that too many people just prefer to be negative. If it helps, I think you did the right thing.