I tried watching Succession but it made me squirm & I can watch Ozark & many other shows with language, violence & sexual content. I just couldn’t get past watching the young men in it.
I can't begin to tell you why I stuck with it. The main characters threatened to make me physically sick at first--especially Roman. All I can come up with is the writing. It became too compelling to leave behind.
Though I never use the word either, I've watched a lot of shows that overuse it and have no problem with it there. Strange how that works, and I'm glad I'm not the only one experiencing this dichotomy!
In the Navy, the use of “f*ck” was ubiquitous. To the point that it was used about as often as “y’know”... and had about the same emotional content.
Herman Wouk addressed this in his book “The Caine Mutiny.” Something along the lines of, “People have told me that sailors in my book don’t talk like real sailors. Thanks, I served for years on destroyers, I know. But if I wrote like they talked, the average reader would be shocked and lose track of what was going on — so I toned it down.” At one point there’s a passage something like, “The chief let out a string of profanity so sharp and vulgar that it could peel the paint off a bulkhead, the sum total of which conveyed: my, this is highly unusual!” Yup!
Roy would have been considered soft spoken in the Navy. 😁
But the F-word isn't just an overused cliche. It's coarsening and cheapening THOUGHT. Whenever you hear it, ask yourself, "Did the character have an idea, a thought, at the precise moment when he chose that word?" No. He's only trying to beef up the probably feeble thought that comes AFTER the F-word. It's a product of chronic lazy screenwriting.
And I'm not sure it's even written that much anymore. I don't think it has to be. I think on set the actor reads the line and the director instructs: "No, don't say you're 'Fed up'. Say, you're 'F-ing fed up'".
It's a profound aesthetic error that's infested Hollywood for 30 years or so, not just in word choices but in effects of all kinds -- writers, directors and actors habitually mistake blatancy for power. They increasingly can't tell the difference.
You and I agree on so much, however, this is one area where we diverge. I find the F word is applicable to many things. It’s useful as an adjective, noun, etc. The moral of the story is be yourself and be comfortable with it. Diversity makes the world go round. 😊
I’m not an f-bomber. But after working for a year and a half in the newsroom on campus, I let my first one drop. It was such an event, my assistant city editor gasped and went back in and told the room of reporters: “You guys, you made Amanda say f*ck! You better get it together!” 😂
I think the thing you’re tapping into is that there are cultures where the f-word is woven into the vernacular with quite a bit of nuance. Restaurant kitchens, newsrooms, even overseas when I visited the UK, the whole family smattered it everywhere, even the prim and proper mum. No one batted an eye. So watching shows like Ted Lasso, it’s such a full immersion into another world that it is nearly impossible to not just go along for the ride.
I specifically appreciated your note about imagining a Roy Kent who doesn’t swear—they didn’t even shy away from it! The f-word here was a crutch for not knowing how to say his real feelings! Such a good catch.
All that to say, thanks for the f*cking good chat. ;-)
This may be slightly long Ramona but I found it funny that I had actually written about this some months ago after reading "Unarmoured". I resonated with her story in so many ways but also found myself asking why the excessive use of the *F* Bomb? At the time I considered writing a blog and then opted out.
However, because I resonated with what you wrote, plus the fact that I'm from your era, I felt compelled to add a comment - or two...LOL. I don't think I even heard it until I was in my teens and boy oh boy, it was impactful and not in a good way!
In our world today the overuse is leaving me with a sense of sadness, particularly as it has become so mainstream for our young teens. Is this truly the way to make some kind of impression and be accepted by peers? I've sincerely tried to just be an "observer" by stepping back and considering why it causes such should discord/angst/revolt in me?
All I've been able to discern (for myself) is that it doesn't express any type of spirituality, kindness, compassion, or love and I haven't been able to see how it may be serving the "greater good" of our species.
So, my practice of pausing, taking a few deep breaths and asking myself "how important will it be in five years" then of course returns a response from my soul voice... "you silly one - you won't even remember it at all".
I was listening to Lee Harris and Part one of the "Almost 30" exchange some months back and have to say I was so delighted to be able to reflect that not one of the participants found it necessary to use the *F* Bomb - not even once throughout the entire Q&A. So that gave me hope.
I guess my age is showing and so be it. I really don't want my grandchildren and great-grandchildren to be left with the legacy of a G'ma/Gigi who had a "foul mouth".
I tried watching Succession but it made me squirm & I can watch Ozark & many other shows with language, violence & sexual content. I just couldn’t get past watching the young men in it.
I can't begin to tell you why I stuck with it. The main characters threatened to make me physically sick at first--especially Roman. All I can come up with is the writing. It became too compelling to leave behind.
Though I never use the word either, I've watched a lot of shows that overuse it and have no problem with it there. Strange how that works, and I'm glad I'm not the only one experiencing this dichotomy!
In the Navy, the use of “f*ck” was ubiquitous. To the point that it was used about as often as “y’know”... and had about the same emotional content.
Herman Wouk addressed this in his book “The Caine Mutiny.” Something along the lines of, “People have told me that sailors in my book don’t talk like real sailors. Thanks, I served for years on destroyers, I know. But if I wrote like they talked, the average reader would be shocked and lose track of what was going on — so I toned it down.” At one point there’s a passage something like, “The chief let out a string of profanity so sharp and vulgar that it could peel the paint off a bulkhead, the sum total of which conveyed: my, this is highly unusual!” Yup!
Roy would have been considered soft spoken in the Navy. 😁
But the F-word isn't just an overused cliche. It's coarsening and cheapening THOUGHT. Whenever you hear it, ask yourself, "Did the character have an idea, a thought, at the precise moment when he chose that word?" No. He's only trying to beef up the probably feeble thought that comes AFTER the F-word. It's a product of chronic lazy screenwriting.
And I'm not sure it's even written that much anymore. I don't think it has to be. I think on set the actor reads the line and the director instructs: "No, don't say you're 'Fed up'. Say, you're 'F-ing fed up'".
It's a profound aesthetic error that's infested Hollywood for 30 years or so, not just in word choices but in effects of all kinds -- writers, directors and actors habitually mistake blatancy for power. They increasingly can't tell the difference.
You and I agree on so much, however, this is one area where we diverge. I find the F word is applicable to many things. It’s useful as an adjective, noun, etc. The moral of the story is be yourself and be comfortable with it. Diversity makes the world go round. 😊
I’m not an f-bomber. But after working for a year and a half in the newsroom on campus, I let my first one drop. It was such an event, my assistant city editor gasped and went back in and told the room of reporters: “You guys, you made Amanda say f*ck! You better get it together!” 😂
I think the thing you’re tapping into is that there are cultures where the f-word is woven into the vernacular with quite a bit of nuance. Restaurant kitchens, newsrooms, even overseas when I visited the UK, the whole family smattered it everywhere, even the prim and proper mum. No one batted an eye. So watching shows like Ted Lasso, it’s such a full immersion into another world that it is nearly impossible to not just go along for the ride.
I specifically appreciated your note about imagining a Roy Kent who doesn’t swear—they didn’t even shy away from it! The f-word here was a crutch for not knowing how to say his real feelings! Such a good catch.
All that to say, thanks for the f*cking good chat. ;-)
This may be slightly long Ramona but I found it funny that I had actually written about this some months ago after reading "Unarmoured". I resonated with her story in so many ways but also found myself asking why the excessive use of the *F* Bomb? At the time I considered writing a blog and then opted out.
However, because I resonated with what you wrote, plus the fact that I'm from your era, I felt compelled to add a comment - or two...LOL. I don't think I even heard it until I was in my teens and boy oh boy, it was impactful and not in a good way!
In our world today the overuse is leaving me with a sense of sadness, particularly as it has become so mainstream for our young teens. Is this truly the way to make some kind of impression and be accepted by peers? I've sincerely tried to just be an "observer" by stepping back and considering why it causes such should discord/angst/revolt in me?
All I've been able to discern (for myself) is that it doesn't express any type of spirituality, kindness, compassion, or love and I haven't been able to see how it may be serving the "greater good" of our species.
So, my practice of pausing, taking a few deep breaths and asking myself "how important will it be in five years" then of course returns a response from my soul voice... "you silly one - you won't even remember it at all".
I was listening to Lee Harris and Part one of the "Almost 30" exchange some months back and have to say I was so delighted to be able to reflect that not one of the participants found it necessary to use the *F* Bomb - not even once throughout the entire Q&A. So that gave me hope.
I guess my age is showing and so be it. I really don't want my grandchildren and great-grandchildren to be left with the legacy of a G'ma/Gigi who had a "foul mouth".